Archive for the ‘Personal Success’ Category
There is a close association between personal charisma and success in life.
Probably 85 percent of your success and happiness will come from your relationships and interactions with others. The more positively others respond to you, the easier it will be for you to get the things you want.
The Law of Attraction
In essence, when we discuss charisma, we are talking about the law of attraction. This law has been stated in many different ways down through the centuries, but it basically says that you inevitably attract into your life the people and circumstances that harmonize with your dominant thoughts.
You Are A Living Magnet
In a sense, you are a living magnet, and you are constantly radiating thought waves, like a radio station radiates sound waves, that are picked up by other people. Your thoughts, intensified by your emotions, as radio waves are intensified by electric impulses, go out from you and are picked up by anyone who is tuned in to a similar wavelength. You then attract into your life people, ideas, opportunities, resources, circumstances and anything else that is consistent with your dominant frame of mind.
The law of attraction also explains how you can build up your levels of charisma so that you can have a greater and more positive impact on the people whose cooperation, support and affection you desire.
Perception is Everything
The critical thing to remember about charisma is that it is largely based on perception. It is based on what people think about you. It is not so much reality as it is what people perceive you to be. For example, one person can create charisma in another person by speaking in glowing terms about that person to a third party. If you believe that you are about to meet an outstanding and important person, that person will tend to have charisma for you.
Mother Teresa of Calcutta
One of the most charismatic people in the world was Mother Teresa of Calcutta. In a physical sense, she was a quiet, elderly, frail woman in poor health, and she wore a modest nun’s habit. She might have been ignored by a person passing her on the street, were it not for the tremendous charisma she developed and for the fact that her appearance was so well-known to so many people as a result.
How Would You Feel?
If someone told you that he was going to introduce you to a brilliant, self-made millionaire who was very quiet and unassuming about his success, you would almost naturally imbue that person with charisma, and in his presence, you would not act the same as you would if you had been told nothing at all. Charisma begins largely in the mind of the beholder.
Lasting charisma depends more upon the person you really are than upon just the things you do.
Continually look for ways to improve other’s perceptions of you so that you can be more influential with them. Be a living magnet.
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, be clear about the messages you are sending and the perceptions you are creating in others. Are these perceptions consistent with the impressions you want to make?
Second, see yourself and imagine yourself every day as an important powerful and charming person. Treat others as you would if you were already strong, famous and influential.
Fake it until you make it!
The Law of Attraction — In Action LIVE Teleseminar
Your self-concept is made up of three parts, each of which affects each of the others.
Understanding these three parts enables you to put your hands on the keyboard of your own mental computer. When you learn to take charge of the development of a new and positive self-concept of selling, you can then control your sales destiny for the rest of your career.
Determine Your Direction
The first part of the self-concept is the "self-ideal." Your self-ideal largely determines the direction in which you are going with your life. It guides the growth and evolution of your character and personality. Your self-ideal is a combination of all of the qualities and attributes of other people that you most admire. Your self-ideal is a description of the person you would very much like to be if you could embody the qualities that you most aspire to.
Strive Toward Excellence
Throughout your life, you have seen and read about the qualities of courage, confidence, compassion, love, fortitude, perseverance, patience, forgiveness and integrity. Over time, these qualities have instilled in you an ideal to which you aspire. You might not always live up to the very best that you know, but you are constantly striving to be a better person in light of those qualities that you value so highly. In fact, everything that you do on a day-to-day basis is affected by your comparing your activities with these ideal qualities and your striving to behave consistently with them.
Clarity is Essential
Successful salespeople have very clear ideals for themselves and their careers. Unsuccessful salespeople have fuzzy ideals. Successful salespeople are very clear about being excellent in every part of their work and their personal lives. Unsuccessful salespeople don’t give the subject very much thought. One of the primary characteristics of successful men and women in every walk of life is that they have very clearly defined ideals and they are very aware of whether or not their current behaviors are consistent with their idealized behaviors.
Set Challenging Goals
Part of your ideals are your goals. As you set higher and more challenging goals, your self-ideal improves and crystallizes. When you set goals for the kind of person you want to be and the kind of life you want to live, your self-ideal rises and becomes a greater guiding and motivating force in your life.
The Science of Self-Confidence Training Kit will help you achieve your goals!
Your Future is Unlimited
Perhaps the most important thing for you to realize is that whatever anyone else has done or become, you can do or become as well. Improvements in your self-ideal begin in your imagination, and in your imagination, there are no limits except the ones that you accept.
What is your ideal vision of the very best person you could possibly become? How would you behave each day if you were already that person? Asking yourself these questions and then living your life consistent with the answers is the first step to creating yourself in your ideal image.
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, dream big dreams. Set big, exciting, challenging goals and ideals for yourself in every part of your life. Allow yourself to imagine a wonderful life ahead.
Second, think about how you would act if you were an outstanding person in every way. Then, practice being this person, as though you were acting a role in a play. You’ll immediately notice a difference in your behavior.
The Science of Self-Confidence Training Kit
The Key Question for You to Ask.
Why are you on the payroll? This is one of the most important questions you ever ask and answer, over and over again, throughout your career.
As it happens, most people are not sure exactly why they are on the payroll. But if you are not crystal clear about why it is that you are on the payroll and what results you have been hired to accomplish, it is very hard for you to perform at your best and get paid more and promoted faster.
Determine the Results Expected of You
In its simplest terms, you have been hired to get specific results. A wage or a salary is a payment for a specific quality and quantity of work that can be combined with the work of others to create a product or service that customers are willing to pay for.
Maximum Achievement Goal Planner will help you get results!
Define Your Key Result Areas
Each job can be broken down into about five to seven key result areas, seldom more. These are the results that you absolutely, positively have to get to fulfill your responsibilities and make your maximum contribution to your organization. Your failure to perform in a critical result area of your work can lead to failure at your job. There is essential knowledge and skill that you must have for your job. These demands are constantly changing. There are core competencies that you have developed that make it possible for you to do your job in the first place. But there are always key results that are central to your work and which determine your success or failure in your job.
You Are Responsible
A key result area is defined as something for which you are completely responsible. This means that if you don’t do it, it doesn’t get done. A key result area is an activity that is under your control. It is an output of your work that becomes an input or a contributing factor to the work of others.
Give Yourself A Grade
Once you have determined your key result areas, the second step is for you to grade yourself on a scale of 1-10 in each of those areas. Where are you strong and where are you weak? Where are you getting excellent results and where are you under performing?
Here’s the rule: Your weakest key result area sets the height at which you can use all your other skills and abilities.
This rule says that you could be exceptional in six out of seven key result areas but really poor in the seventh. And your poor performance in the seventh area will hold you back and determine how much you achieve with all your other skills. This weakness will act as a drag on your effectiveness and be a constant source of friction and frustration.
Decide to Become Excellent
The fact is that everybody has both strengths and weaknesses. Refuse to rationalize, justify or defend your areas of weakness. Instead, identify them clearly. Set a goal and make a plan to become very good in each of those areas. Just think! You may be only one critical skill away from top performance at your job.
Here is one of the greatest questions you will ever ask and answer: "What one skill, if I developed and did it in an excellent fashion, would have the greatest positive impact on my career?"
You should use this question to guide your career for the rest of your life. Look into yourself for the answer. You usually know what it is.
First, identify the key result areas of your work. What are they? Write down the key results you have to get to do your job in an excellent fashion. Give yourself a grade from 1-10 on each one. And then determine the one key skill that, if you did it in an excellent manner, would help you the most in your work.
Second, make a habit of doing this analysis regularly for the rest of your career. Never stop improving. This decision alone can change your life.
Maximum Achievement Goal Planner
You already have everything you need to create a wonderful life for yourself.
You know everything you need to know to be your own best friend, a gentle guide, a teacher and a helper to yourself so you can be truly happy and fulfilled.
You can learn how to become your own psychotherapist for life, and how to resolve the difficulties that stand between you and personal joy.
Be Honest With Yourself
The starting point of becoming your own best friend is for you to be perfectly honest with yourself and your relationships. Refuse to practice self-delusion or hope for the best. For example, when something is making you unhappy, for any reason, the situation will tend to get worse rather than better. So avoid the temptation to engage in denial, to pretend that nothing is wrong, to wish and hope and pray that, whatever it is, it will go away and you won’t have to do anything. The fact is that it probably will get worse before it gets better and that ultimately you will need to face the situation and do something about it.
Deal With Your Problem at a Higher Level
There’s an old saying that you can’t solve a problem on the level that you meet it. This means that wrestling with a persistent problem is often fruitless and frustrating. For example, if two people who are in a relationship together are constantly fighting and negotiating and looking for some way to resolve their difficulties, they may be attempting to solve the problem on the wrong level. Dealing with the problem on a higher level, those people would ask the question, "In terms of being happy, is this the right relationship for us in the first place?"
Find the Right Job For You
Many people work very hard and experience considerable frustration trying to do a particular job. However, in terms of their own happiness, the right answer might be to do something else, or to do what they’re doing in a different place, or to do it with different people-or all three. Here are a few questions for you to answer in this arena of happiness. Write them down at the top of a sheet of paper, and then write as many answers to each one as you possibly can.
Simplify Your Life and find happiness.
What Would It Take?
The first question is: "What would it take for me to be perfectly happy?" Write down every single thing that you can imagine would be in your life if you were perfectly happy at this very moment. Write down things such as health, happiness, prosperity, loving relationships, inner peace, travel, car, clothes, homes, money, and so on. Let your mind run freely. Imagine that you have no limitations at all.
What is Holding You Back?
The second question is a little tougher. Write down at the top of a page this question: "In what situations in my life, and with whom, am I not perfectly happy?" Force yourself to think about every part of your day, from morning to night, and write down every element that makes you unhappy or dissatisfied in any way. Remember, proper diagnosis is half the cure. Identifying the unsatisfactory situations is the first step to resolving them.
Determine Your Happiest Moment
The third question will give you some important guidelines. Write down at the top of a sheet of paper these words: "In looking over my life, where and when have I been the happiest? Where was I, with whom was I, and what was I doing?"
Decide What to Do
Once you have the answers to those questions, think about what you can do, starting immediately, to begin creating the kind of life that you dream of. It may take you a week, a month, or a year, but that doesn’t matter. Every single thing you do that moves you closer to your ideal vision will be rewarding in itself. You’ll become a more positive and optimistic person. You’ll feel more confident and more in charge of your life, and you’ll achieve true peace of mind.
Here are three steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, examine your business and personal relationships carefully. Is there any situation you wouldn’t get into again if you had it to do over?
Second, make a list of every single thing in your life that would make you happy and then think about what you could do to begin achieving them.
Third, allow yourself to dream and fantasize about your ideal life, what it would look like and feel like, and then do something every day to make it a reality.
Simplify Your Life
There are four rules of time. The first is that time is perishable.
This means that it cannot be saved. In fact, time can only be spent. Because time is perishable, the only thing you can do with it is to spend it differently, to reallocate your time away from activities of low value and toward activities of higher value. But once it is gone, it is gone forever.
Time Is Indispensable
The second rule of time is that time is indispensable. All work requires time. No matter what it is you want to do in life, even looking out a window or sleeping in for a few extra minutes, it requires a certain amount of time. And according to the 10/90 Rule, the 10% of time that you take to plan your activities carefully in advance will save you 90% of the effort involved in achieving your goals later. The very act of thinking through and planning your work in advance will dramatically reduce the amount of time that it takes you to do the actual job.
The Currency of the Future
The third rule of time is that time is irreplaceable. Nothing else will do, especially in relationships. Time is the only currency that means anything in your relationships with the members of your family, your friends, colleagues, customers and coworkers. Truly effective people give a lot of thought to creating blocks of time that they can then spend, without interruption, with the important people in their lives.
Use your time well with Time Management for Results
Spell the Word Correctly
There is a question: "How do children spell the word ‘Love?’" And the answer is "T-I-M-E." It is the same with your spouse, as well. The important people in your life equate the amount of time that you spend with them, face to face, head to head, knee to knee, with the amount that you actually love them.
Grow Your Relationships
The more time that you spend with another person, especially a member of your family, the deeper grows your understanding and affection for that person. If you get too busy to spend time with your children, you eventually lose contact with them and they go off into their own personal world of school, peers and other activities.
The Key to Goal-Achievement
The fourth rule is that time is essential for accomplishment. Every goal you want to achieve, everything you want to accomplish, requires time. In fact, one of the smartest things you ever do, when you set a goal, is to sit down and allocate the exact amount of time that you are going to have to invest to achieve that goal. The failure to do this almost always leaves the goal unaccomplished.
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action:
First, decide today to redirect and reallocate your time away from low-value tasks and toward high-value activities.
Second, make a plan to spend more time face-to-face with the most important people in your life. The more you think about the use of your time, the better you will become.
Time Management for Results
One of the most powerful personal programming activities you can engage in is positive self-talk.
Be your own cheerleader and talk to yourself positively all of the time.
Think About Your Dreams
As it happens, the average person talks to himself in a negative way. As much as 94 percent of your inner dialogue tends to be about the things you fear, your worries, the people you’re angry at, your problems, your concerns and so on. You have to consciously keep your words, your inner dialogue, consistent with what you wish to accomplish.
The Most Powerful Antidote
Psychologists have proven that the words, "I can do it," are the antidote to the fear of failure that often holds you back from trying. Repeat these words over and over to yourself whenever you feel fearful or doubtful about anything that you want to attempt. Say very enthusiastically to yourself, "I can do it, I can do it, I can do it!" When you start saying, "I can do it, I can do it," you drive that message deep into your subconscious mind. This message lowers your fears and builds your self-confidence.
Learn and remember more with Rapid Learning Made Simple
Make A Million!
Another thing you can say to yourself is, "I make a million. I make a million." Impress that message into your subconscious mind. Whenever you think about your work, say over and over again, "I’m the best, I’m the best, I’m the best." Making any one of these three statements, or anything that is positive makes you feel good about yourself and causes you to be more motivated. You become more focused, more determined. Wealthy, successful people have a continuous inner dialogue that is positive and constructive and uplifting and consistent with their goals and objectives.
Feed Your Mind Continually
Feed your mind from morning to night with words, pictures, information and ideas consistent with your goals for financial success. Develop the habit of thinking positively and confidently about wealth accumulation. Read stories, books and articles about other successful people. Think about how you could be like them. Visualize yourself, imagine, fantasize, pretend in your mind that you are like the kind of people that you admire and respect and want to be like.
Select A Role Model
Psychologists have proven that role models are essential for magnetizing your mind with the qualities and characteristics that you wish to develop in yourself. Pick a person that you admire. Whenever you face any kind of difficult situation, ask yourself, how would this person act in this situation? What would this person do? How would this person behave? You’ll find that when you think about how someone you admire might behave, your own thinking becomes better and you tend to act at your very best.
Become An Expert
Read everything you can find about your business. Become an expert in your field. The more you learn about your profession, your trade and your craft, the more confident you will become that you can do well in it.
Here are two things you can do to put yourself on the new mental diet for financial success:
First, repeat to yourself, over and over again, the wonderful words "I can do it! I can do it! I can do it!" Whenever you are anticipating any new goal or opportunity. This affirmation builds your self-confidence and conditions you for success.
Second, monitor your mental diet the way you would your physical diet. Be sure that you feed yourself throughout the day with positive stories, words, pictures and conversations about the things you want to have in your life. Refuse to read, watch, listen to or discuss things that are negative or depressing. This will make a tremendous difference in how you feel and how you act.
Rapid Learning Made Simple
Push to the Top
All successful people are very productive. They work longer hours and they work better hours. They get a lot more done than the average person. They get paid more and promoted faster. They are highly respected and esteemed by everyone around them. They become leaders and role models. Inevitably, they rise to the top of their fields and to the top of their income ranges, and so can you.
Everything is Learnable
Every single one of these tested and proven strategies for managing your time and doubling your productivity is learnable through practice and repetition. Each of these methods will eventually become a habit of both thinking and working.
Learn faster with Rapid Learning Made Simple
The Payoff is Remarkable
When you begin applying these techniques to your work and to your life, your self-esteem, self-confidence, self-respect and sense of personal pride will go up immediately. The pay off for you will be tremendous, for the rest of your life.
Make A Decision!
Every positive change in your life begins with a clear, unequivocal decision that you are going to either do something or stop doing something. Significant change starts when you decide to either get in or get out, either fish or cut bait.
Learning is a lot like exercising: it’s an activity that must be done often to attain maximum results. Your brain, just like the other muscles in your body, needs to be challenged and remain active.
The Vital Quality of Success
Decisiveness is one of the most important qualities of successful and happy men and women, and decisiveness is developed through practice and repetition, over and over again until it becomes as natural to you as breathing in and breathing out.
Why People Are Poor
The sad fact is that people are poor because they have not yet decided to be rich. People are overweight and unfit because they have not yet decided to be thin and fit. People are inefficient time wasters because they haven’t yet decided to be highly productive in everything they do.
Become An Expert
Decide today that you are going to become an expert in time management and personal productivity, no matter how long it takes or how much you invest in it. Resolve today that you are going to practice these principles, over and over again until they become second nature.
Here are two steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, hold your own feet to the fire. Resolve to start earlier, work harder and stay later. Don’t let yourself off the hook.
Second, become an expert in time management. Learn and practice time management techniques every day until they become habits.
Rapid Learning Made Simple
The art of good conversation centers very much on your ability to ask questions and to listen attentively to the answers.
You can lace the conversation with your insights, ideas, and opinions, but you perfect the art and skill of conversation by perfecting the art and skill of asking good, well-worded questions that direct the conversation and give other people an opportunity to express themselves.
Ask Open Ended Questions
Ask open-ended questions that cannot be answered with a simple "yes" or "no." Open-ended questions encourage the speaker to expand on his thoughts and comments. And one question will lead to another. You can ask open-ended questions almost endlessly, drawing out of the other person everything that he or she has to say on a particular subject.
Be Content to Listen
In order to be an excellent conversationalist, you must resist the urge to dominate the discussion. The very best conversationalists seem to be low-key, easy-going, cheerful, and genuinely interested in the other person. They seem to be quite content to listen when other people are talking and they make their own contributions to the dialogue rather short and to the point.
Learn the secrets to communicating in How to Talk: Secrets of the Great Communicators + Bonuses!
Share the Opportunity to Talk
In fact, good conversation has an easy ebb and flow, like the tide coming in and going out. Whether it is between two people or among several, the conversation should shift back and forth, with each person getting an opportunity to talk. Conversation in this sense is like a ball that is tossed from person to person, with no one holding on to it for very long.
If you feel that you have been talking for too long, you should stop and ask a question of someone in the group. You will be tossing the conversational ball and giving that individual an opportunity to converse.
Learn to Listen Well
Listening is the most important of all skills for successful conversation. Many people are very poor listeners. Since everyone enjoys talking, it takes a real effort to practice the fundamentals of excellent listening and to make them a habit.
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, make a habit of asking good, open-ended questions of others in every conversation and in response to problems or difficulties. This shows interest and increases your understanding.
Second, take a deep breath, relax and let the other person talk more. Practice over and over until you become an excellent listener.
How to Talk: Secrets of the Great Communicators + Bonuses!
How Are You Treated By Others?
Self-acceptance begins in infancy, with the influence of your parents and siblings and other important people.
Your own level of self-acceptance is determined largely by how well you feel you are accepted by the important people in your life.
Your attitude toward yourself is determined largely by the attitudes that you think other people have toward you. When you believe that other people think highly of you, your level of self-acceptance and self-esteem goes straight up.
The best way to build a healthy personality involves understanding yourself and your feelings.
Let the Light Shine In
This is achieved through the simple exercise of self-disclosure. For you to truly understand yourself, or to stop being troubled by things that may have happened in your past, you must be able to disclose yourself to at least one person. You have to be able to get those things off your chest. You must rid yourself of those thoughts and feelings by revealing them to someone who won’t make you feel guilty or ashamed for what has happened.
Understand What Makes You Tick
The second part of personality development follows from self-disclosure, and it’s called self-awareness. Only when you can disclose what you’re truly thinking and feeling to someone else can you become aware of those thoughts and emotions If the other person simply listens to you without commenting or criticizing, you have the opportunity to become more aware of the person you are and why you do the things you do. You begin to develop perspective, or what the Buddhists call "detachment."
Be Honest With Yourself
Now we come to the good part. After you’ve gone through self-disclosure to self-awareness, you arrive at self-acceptance. You accept yourself for the person you are, with good points and bad points, with strengths and weaknesses, and with the normal frailties of a human being. When you develop the ability to stand back and look at yourself honestly, and to candidly admit to others that you may not be perfect but you’re all you’ve got, you start to enjoy a heightened sense of self-acceptance.
Accept yourself with The Science of Self-Confidence
Do An Inventory of Your Accomplishments
A valuable exercise for developing higher levels of self-acceptance involves doing an inventory of yourself. In doing this inventory, your job is to accentuate the positive and minimize the negative.
Think of your unique talents and abilities. Think of your core skills, the things that you do exceptionally well that account for your success in your profession and in your personal life right now.
Think About Your Future
Think about your future possibilities and the fact that your potential is virtually unlimited. You can do what you want to do and go where you want to go. You can be the person you want to be. You can set large and small goals and make plans and move step-by-step, progressively toward their realization. There are no obstacles to what you can accomplish except the obstacles that you create in your mind.
Here are three steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action:
First, sit down with your spouse, or a good friend, and tell him or her about something that is troubling you and is still causing you unhappiness.
Second, develop perspective on your problem by standing back from it and imagining that it was happening to someone else. What advice would you give to that person?
Third, think continually about the good experiences and accomplishments you have enjoyed in the past. Remind yourself regularly that you are a pretty good person and you’ve done a lot of good things in your life.
The Science of Self-Confidence
You may have a thousand different goals over the course of your lifetime, but they all will fall into one of four basic categories.
Everything you do is an attempt to enhance the quality of your life in one or more of these areas.
The Key to Happiness
The first category is your desire for happy relationships. You want to love and be loved by others. You want to have a happy, harmonious home life. You want to get along well with the people around you, and you want to earn the respect of the people you respect. Your involvement in social and community affairs results from your desire to have happy interactions with others and to make a contribution to the society you live in.
Enjoy Your Work
The second category is your desire for interesting and challenging work. You want to make a good living, of course, but more than that, you want to really enjoy your occupation or profession. The very best times of your life are when you are completely absorbed in your work.
Become Financially Independent
The third category is your desire for financial independence. You want to be free from worries about money. You want to have enough money in the bank so that you can make decisions without counting your pennies. You want to achieve a certain financial state so that you can retire in comfort and never have to be concerned about whether or not you have enough money to support your lifestyle. Financial independence frees you from poverty and a need to depend upon others for your livelihood. If you save and invest regularly throughout your working life, you will eventually reach the point where you will never have to work again.
Enjoy Excellent Health
The fourth and final category is your desire for good health, to be free of pain and illness and to have a continuous flow of energy and feelings of well-being. In fact, your health is so central to your life that you take it for granted until something happens to disrupt it.
Turn your life around with The Psychology of Achievement
Peace of Mind is the Key
Peace of mind is essential for every one of these. The greater your peace of mind, the more relaxed and positive you are, the less stress you suffer, the better is your overall health.
The more peace of mind you have, the better are your relationships, the more optimistic, friendly and confident you are with everyone in your life. When you feel good about yourself on the inside, you do your work better and take more pride in it. You are a better boss and coworker. And the greater your overall peace of mind, the more likely you are to earn a good living, save regularly for the future and ultimately achieve financial independence.
Control Your Attention
Life is very much a study of attention. Whatever you dwell upon and think about grows and expands in your life. The more you pay attention to your relationships, the quality and quantity of your work, your finances and your health, the better they will become and the happier you will be.
Here are three things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, take time on a regular basis to think about what would make you really happy in each of the four areas.
Second, set specific, measurable goals for improvement in your relationships, your health, your work and your finances and write them down.
Third, resolve to do something every day to increase the quality of some area of your life – and then keep your resolution.
The Psychology of Achievement