How to Let Go: 4 People You MUST Forgive to Move Forward

Written By | Personal Success | January 17th, 2012 | 46 Comments »

how to forgive

There are four people you need to forgive if you are serious about changing your life and learning how to live in the now.

The first are your parents, living or dead. You must absolutely forgive them for every mistake they ever made in bringing you up. At the very least, you should be grateful to them for giving you life. They got you here. If you are happy to be alive, you can forgive them for everything else. Never complain about them again.

Many of my seminar participants have phoned or visited their parents and told them that they forgive them for everything. Often this simple act of courage and character has had a profound effect on their relationship with their mother or father. From that day onward, they have become good friends, which lasted the rest of their lives together.

FREE REPORT: Step-by-step guide on Goal Setting, a $20 value.

On the other hand, by not forgiving your parents, you remain forever a child. You block your own chance to grow up and become a fully functioning adult. You continue to see yourself as a victim. Even worse, you keep your negative feelings of inferiority and anger alive. If your parents die without your having forgiven them, it can bother you for the rest of your life.

Close Personal Relationships

The second person or persons you must forgive are the people from your marriages or relationships that didn’t work out. These intimate relationships can be so intense, and so threatening to your feelings of self-esteem and self-worth, that you can be angry and unforgiving toward those people for years.

But you were at least partially responsible. Have the personal strength and integrity to say, “I am responsible,” and then forgive the other person and let him or her go. Say the words, “I forgive him/her for everything and I wish him/her well.” Each time you repeat this, the negative emotion attached to the memory will diminish. Soon it will be gone forever.

How to Let Go

Many of my graduates have found that “the letter” is the key to putting a bad relationship behind them forever. This is a powerful technique that can free you from feelings of anger and resentment almost instantly.

Here is how it works: You to sit down and write the other person a letter of forgiveness. It consists of three parts.

First you say, “I forgive you for everything you ever did that hurt me.”

Second, you write out a description or list of every single thing that you are still mad about. Some people write several pages in this part.

Third, you end the letter with the words, “I wish you well.”

You then take the letter to the mailbox and drop it in. At that moment, you will feel a huge sense of relief, and you will be free at last.

By the way, don’t worry about how the other person might react. That is not your concern. Your goal is to free yourself, to regain your peace of mind, and to get on with the wonderful life that lies ahead of you.

Clear Your Slate and Move Forward

The third person you must forgive is everyone else in your life who has ever hurt you in any way. Let them go. Forgive every boss, business partner, friend, crook or betrayer who has ever caused you grief of any kind. Clean the slate and forgive to forget. Wipe each of their names and images off by saying, “I forgive him/her for everything, and I wish him/her well.” Repeat this statement each time you think of the person or situation until the negative feelings are gone.

Set Yourself Free

The fourth and final person you have to forgive is yourself. You must absolutely forgive yourself for every silly, senseless, wicked, brainless, thoughtless or cruel thing you have ever done or said. Stop carrying these past mistakes around with you. That was then and this is now.

Think of it this way. When you did those things in the past that you still feel badly about, you were not the person you are today. At that time, you were a different person, younger and less experienced. You were not your true self. You were an immature version of the person you have become with experience. Stop beating yourself up for something that occurred in the past that you cannot change.

Just say, “I forgive myself for every mistake I ever made. I am a thoroughly good person and I am going to have a wonderful future.” Whenever you think of that event or situation, just repeat, “I forgive myself completely.” And then get on with your life. Focus on the future rather than the past and don’t look back. Look at where you are going rather than where you have been.

Finally, if you did something that hurt someone, and you still feel badly about it, you can go to that person, or write, and apologize. Tell the person you are sorry for what you did or said. Whatever his or her reaction, positive or negative, it doesn’t matter. The very act of repentance, of expressing regret, will set you free.

I hope you enjoyed this post on learning how to let go and start moving forward in life.  Please leave a comment or share with your friends below!

Topics included in this article include

Move Forward

Moving Forward

How to Let Go

Forgive and Forget

About Brian Tracy – Brian Tracy is recognized as the top sales training and personal success authority in the world today. He has authored more than 60 books and has produced more than 500 audio and video learning programs on sales, management, business success and personal development, including worldwide bestseller The Psychology of Achievement. Brian’s goal is to help you achieve your personal and business goals faster and easier than you ever imagined. You can follow him on google+, facebook, and twitter.

DOWNLOAD THIS FREE E-BOOK AND DISCOVER THE EXACT FORMULA FOR GOAL SETTING SUCCESS!

When you subscribe, you’ll get access to the Goals! E-Book, instantly!

Subscribe now by entering your email address below.




You may unsubscribe anytime. Read our Privacy Policy

Your Free gift - Goals!

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

46 Comments

ADD A REPLY





  1. Gail says on March 17, 2014 at 12:05 am:

    What’s Happening i’m new to this, I stumbled upon this I’ve discovered It absolutely useful and it has aided me out loads.

    I hope to give a contribution & assist other customers like its
    aided me. Great job.

  2. Mirta says on March 6, 2014 at 8:17 pm:

    I blog often and I genuinely appreciate your content.
    This article has really peaked my interest. I’m going to take
    a note of your website and keep checking for new information
    about once per week. I opted in for your RSS feed too.

    • Brian Tracy says on March 10, 2014 at 2:10 pm:

      You are very welcome. Thank you for commenting and I’m happy to hear that you enjoyed the blog post. To YOUR success, Brian Tracy

  3. Dawon says on January 24, 2014 at 9:42 pm:

    This message has really helped me up until now I thought I would not learn to forgive those that did wrong to me but i’m glad I came across this

Close

DOWNLOAD THIS FREE E-BOOK AND DISCOVER THE EXACT FORMULA FOR GOAL SETTING SUCCESS!

When you subscribe, youll get access to the Goals! E-Book, instantly!

Subscribe now by entering your email address below.

You may unsubscribe anytime. Read our Privacy Policy

Your Free gift - Goals!

48 queries in 0.802 seconds.