How to Improve Your People Skills With This One Quality
If you want to improve your people skills, one quality stands out as far more important than others.
Do you know what this quality is?
This quality is charm.
Charm is the ability to create extraordinary rapport with anyone, and make him or her feel truly exceptional in your presence.
You might think that you need to be born with charm, but although some people seem to come by it naturally, charm is something that you can learn.
No matter how skilled, smart, or experienced you may be, most of your ability to succeed at anything depends on your ability to win people over, to convince them, to charm them.
It is important to note that the deepest craving of human nature is the need to feel valued and valuable.
Therefore, the secret of charm and improving your people skills is to make others feel important.
The more important you make people feel in your presence the more charming they will perceive you to be.
In this video, I discuss the key to improving people skills:
What are People Skills?
People skills are your ability to accept, appreciate, and admire others on a personal or professional level. Good people skills also extend to your ability to listen and empathize with others, as well as work towards common goals with others.
How to Improve People Skills By Mastering Charm
There are what I like to call, the 5 A’s to mastering charm. Learning these can empower you with the ability to charm anyone you meet.
The greatest gift you can give other people is the attitude of “unconditional positive regard.” That is, you accept them in their entirety, without limitation. The best way to express complete acceptance is simple.
When you smile with happiness at seeing people, their self-esteem jumps automatically. They feel important and valuable and they like the person who is making them feel this way.
You can show your appreciation by saying “thank you” on every occasion, for any large or small reason. You make a habit of thanking everyone in your world from everything they do.
Thank your secretary for her work. Thank your spouse for his help. Thank your children for anything they do that you appreciate. Whenever you smile or say thank you to another person, not only does that person’s self-esteem and feeling of importance jump, but so does yours.
You actually like yourself more every time you do or say anything that causes other people to like themselves more. And the more you like yourself, the more you will genuinely like and care about others and the less concerned you will be about whether you are making a good impression, making your charm even more natural.
All humans have a deep subconscious need for approval.
For this reason, giving approval or praise to others often will make them feel wonderful about themselves, and they will find you to be more interesting, perceptive, highly likable, and extremely charming.
When you give people a genuine, sincere compliment about a trait, possession, or accomplishment, they automatically feel better about themselves.
They feel acknowledged and recognized. They feel valuable and important. Compliment a person on an article of clothing, on a trait like punctuality or persistence, or on an award they’ve won.
Compliment for small things as well as large.
Attention is perhaps the most important quality of charm. It is the most powerful behavior for building rapport and is the key to instant charm.
When you pay close attention to other people, the more valuable and important they will feel they are.
If someone wants to talk to you, immediately discontinue all other activities and give that person your entire attention. Listen as if you are transfixed by what they are saying and then take a moment to pause before replying, rather than jumping in as soon as they take a breath. This shows that you actually heard the person, not only what they said but what they meant.
If you practice the 5 A’s you will be a more charming person and improve your people skills almost immediately.
Before we wrap up, I’d like to leave you with a thought to share with your friends and followers:
“The fastest way to improve your relationships is to make others feel important in every way possible.” @BrianTracy Tweet This
If you want to gain more self-confidence and become a more charming person, click the button below to download my free self-confidence assessment. Discover your level of self-confidence and learn how to improve it immediately.
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About Brian Tracy — Brian is recognized as the top sales training and personal success authority in the world today. He has authored more than 60 books and has produced more than 500 audio and video learning programs on sales, management, business success and personal development, including worldwide bestseller The Psychology of Achievement. Brian's goal is to help you achieve your personal and business goals faster and easier than you ever imagined. You can follow him on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Linkedin and Youtube.